Mom: What's a bong?
Me: Where did you learn that word?
Mom: In the comments on your blog, from the squirrel story.
Me: It's something you use to smoke marijuana. You put water inside and hold your finger over the hole and... Never mind.
Mom: Oh, I thought it was a phallic thing. I got a little upset because I thought people were writing sex comments on your website.
Me: Nope. Just drug paraphernalia.
Mom: Okay then, that's fine.